Reviews reporting thread - Progressive Rock Music Forum

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Originally posted by darkshade

Some pre-release ratings-only for the new Beardfish album that isn't being released until August 28th.

http://www.progarchives.com/album-reviews.asp?id=38627

Thanks, all pre release ratings only nuked accordingly Thumbs Up

This review doesn't really have much of anything to say about the music itself.

http://www.progarchives.com/Review.asp?id=807167

^ I think it's an excellent rebuttal to the prevailing slant of many other reviews of this album but yes, there is not much information about the music. PM sent accordingly inviting the member to edit the review accordingly.

This one should be deleted IMO

[/quote]

Dobermensch

What have I done to deserve this torture? This is a condemnation, not a celebration of prog. A wild flapping chicken with it's head hanging off running around a barnyard banging it's head off chicken wire. Honestly, that's how bad it is. I just find it hard to believe that these guys could produce such a stunning record one year later.

Clearly this album is an improvised jam with no structure or finesse whatsoever. Ugly guitars, random drunk drums, and a bass guitar that's played by someone who's obviously wearing a pair of boxing gloves, displaying all of what's worst from the early 70's. These guys play their instruments like they've never been in possession of a pair of hands.

God... I really own some rubbish don't I? This is an aimless piece of garbage and I find it very hard to believe that these blokes went on to produce one of the best, most bonkers prog albums the following year with the fantastic 'Death May Be Your Santa Claus'. Now there's one that has to be heard to be believed...

Listening to this is almost the same as rubbing vinegar into the eyes of kittens. As soon as I turn it on I can't wait for it to finish. Why don't I just bin this cretin of an album?

While writing the above review I worried that I'd get so annoyed I'd give myself an aneurysm.

This is only my opinion of this decrepit album, which if truth be told may well be the poorest recording I've assessed on the Archives in over 200 reviews. Only 'Hairy Chapter's - Eyes'. comes close.

At last... It's Over!!! Yipee! I'm free again!

[/quote]

Not the most respecrtful review I ever read

Originally posted by Ivan_Melgar_M

This one should be deleted IMO

Dobermensch

What have I done to deserve this torture? This is a condemnation, not a celebration of prog. A wild flapping chicken with it's head hanging off running around a barnyard banging it's head off chicken wire. Honestly, that's how bad it is. I just find it hard to believe that these guys could produce such a stunning record one year later.

Clearly this album is an improvised jam with no structure or finesse whatsoever. Ugly guitars, random drunk drums, and a bass guitar that's played by someone who's obviously wearing a pair of boxing gloves, displaying all of what's worst from the early 70's. These guys play their instruments like they've never been in possession of a pair of hands.

God... I really own some rubbish don't I? This is an aimless piece of garbage and I find it very hard to believe that these blokes went on to produce one of the best, most bonkers prog albums the following year with the fantastic 'Death May Be Your Santa Claus'. Now there's one that has to be heard to be believed...

Listening to this is almost the same as rubbing vinegar into the eyes of kittens. As soon as I turn it on I can't wait for it to finish. Why don't I just bin this cretin of an album?

While writing the above review I worried that I'd get so annoyed I'd give myself an aneurysm.

This is only my opinion of this decrepit album, which if truth be told may well be the poorest recording I've assessed on the Archives in over 200 reviews. Only 'Hairy Chapter's - Eyes'. comes close.

At last... It's Over!!! Yipee! I'm free again!

[/quote]

Not the most respecrtful review I ever read

[/QUOTE]

Being respectful is not necessarily always a virtue or even beneficial to the avowed aim of this site. Yes, it's very abrasive but also reveals the author has researched the artist and clearly appreciates same (Death May Be Your Santa Claus is indeed a fine album) so for me the review is bona fide constructive criticism. (the reviewer even blames himself for buying the album)

So calling what others like GARBAGE is OK?

Not the first one by this guy:

Crikey! what's the big deal with this album? It just sounds like an instrumental version of Marillion' circa '84. The fact that there's literally no vocals doesn't help matters at all. It just falls flat on its face like a dog with three legs.

About Hybris

http://www.progarchives.com/Review.asp?id=299555

Did he ever heard the album? As far as I know Hybris has vocals

About Amon Duul "Collapsing

Life's too short to lisen to this rubbish

http://www.progarchives.com/Review.asp?id=518776

About Young Americans by Bowie

I'd rather listen to 'Tin Machine' than this garbage

http://www.progarchives.com/Review.asp?id=287495

Reviews guidelines

4 - Write in an intelligent and considerate manner. Rude or insulting language (including blatant vulgarity) will not be tolerated!

I don't know, but this is more than rude IMHO

Iván

Edited by Ivan_Melgar_M - August 23 2012 at 15:36

^I really can't see why not or why we should get prudish about it. His vocab is a bit limited obviously, but I have heard harsher reviews from professional journalists.

Coldness doth get away with the badness.

Originally posted by Snow Dog

^I really can't see why not or why we should get prudish about it. His vocab is a bit limited obviously, but I have heard harsher reviews from professional journalists.

It's not his harshness that gets to me, it's the fact that he says almost nothing about the actual music (at least in the review Ivan posted).

"The hero's journey is the journey from strength to weakness."

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