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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 07:23
Originally posted by ExittheLemming ExittheLemming wrote:

^ your trash can vibrates every day
 
My clothes hamper vibrates on Fridays.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 07:25
Jennifer smells like a snowman.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 07:26
Arnold's summer project was installing windshield wipers on every window of his house.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 07:36
This is the perfect song to blast out of a car's windows in any location on the Earth, including Antarctica:
 
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 07:37
I found my nose wheels.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 07:47
Charles has attached toilet paper holders to his belts. You never know...
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 11:10
Another clean-up project for the dog, or Robert...
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 13:37
My queen of diamonds just took your rook.

My bishop just checked your king of clubs.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 13:47
I eat zombies in order to re-establish my place at the top of the food chain.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 14:12
Delete this, Farntron.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 14:29
The screw of the devil's fish.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 19:38
E is not recognized by Inuits. 
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 27 2015 at 22:32
Throw my weight at Wigwams.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 28 2015 at 02:10
My water pistol is a fairy.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 28 2015 at 08:37
Redirected from tangential (disambiguation)

Lavinia can either be:

a fictitious eastern european city named in Hermann Plinth's opiate addled prison memoirs
a complete slapper who smoked a mean rod in Tory voting 80's Chingford
a high class call girl who invariably reversed the charges on any call of nature
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 28 2015 at 13:07
No, I am not Santa Clause.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 28 2015 at 15:07
I have a friend who has beautiful teeth and one of the things I've wonder that has contributed to it is that she chews on bones.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 28 2015 at 15:46
Stop when I say go. Go when I say artichoke.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 28 2015 at 15:50
You can go home with the grand prize of cash money.
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Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 28 2015 at 16:18
I hope I die by chocking on your vomit.
Dig me...But don't...Bury me
I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive
Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect.
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