Hey, stupid!
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Topic: Hey, stupid!
Posted By: Finnforest
Subject: Hey, stupid!
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 19:24
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So here's a topic we've not addressed before....in the spirit of fun. What would you say is the single stupidest thing you have ever done in the past? I will start the stupid-fest. When I was about 20 years old and plastered from round after round of drinks with my buddy at the bar, I made a very bad decision. In a fit of vodka-fuel bravado and trying to amuse my equally plastered friend, I decided I would put out my lit cigarette on the roof of my mouth. I figured the saliva and pressure would snuff it out so fast it'd be no big deal. I was.....mistaken. Can still feel the little hole there with my tongue, decades later.  You? ------------- |
Replies:
Posted By: Epignosis
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 19:34
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I've made a lot of financial mistakes, but in context, they weren't "stupid" I guess. The stupidest thing I did was invite people over for dinner and board games. I drank lots of beer but we had a good time. Well, up the street, just a few houses down, a coworker of mine was celebrating her birthday. So half-gone, I put on my shoes and joined in their festivities. I got drunk there, told my coworker's husband I could take him (I can't. He's ten years younger and military). I couldn't even walk home three houses down the street. I fell and hurt my left hand, and woke up the next morning in a puddle of my own piss. The next morning, you better f**king believe a seasoned witch called me from the depths of my disgrace, my liver having been rearranged from the solid mental grace. ------------- https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays" rel="nofollow - https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays |
Posted By: The Doctor
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 19:40
Ah, so Close to the Edge is about hangovers.  Speaking of which, in college during final exams, I went out with a friend to play some darts and have "just a couple of beers" and wanted to be home by 11, because I had an exam at 8 am the next morning. Around 4:30 a.m., I found myself going to bed after consuming massive amounts of alcohol. Somehow, some way, I woke up at 8 a.m. Threw a baseball cap over my bed head, and slithered my way the 15 minute walk to my class (it took me almost 30 minutes that morning). I must have stunk something awful of alcohol because when I entered the class room and took the exam from the professor's desk, you could see her physically recoil from the brewery stench I had going on. Good times. Good times. ------------- I can understand your anger at me, but what did the horse I rode in on ever do to you? |
Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 19:40
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Ouch Rob! Well at least he (the hubby) didn't kick your arse. As both Rob and I have started with drinking stories....perhaps it is best to issue a warning to our youngsters: Do not try these things at home. And don't start drinking until you're 30. That should probably be the legal age.  ------------- |
Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 19:42
Doc, it's funny how fast 11 can become 4:30, ain't it? 
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Posted By: Epignosis
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 19:56
It was really stupid. My wife had her bags packed. I hadn't harmed anyone but myself, but I scared the sh*t out of her. Stupid f**king thing for a grown man to do. So she had bags packed and kids ready to go. Do you know what kept her around? I had lost the keys the day prior. They were in my shorts in the laundry. That bought me the time to make amends and repent of that bullsh*t. ------------- https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays" rel="nofollow - https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays |
Finnforest wrote:Posted By: The Doctor
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:00
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That is does, Jim. Fortunately the only thing I suffered from was acute embarrassment. Walking into a final exam a half an hour late, looking half dead and smelling of booze, and have everyone stop the exam to look at you as you enter the class room, definitely embarrassing. And I think it was months before my classmates let me live that one down.
------------- I can understand your anger at me, but what did the horse I rode in on ever do to you? |
Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:10
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Doc, did you at least pass the test? Rob, I was wondering if your story was pre or post marriage. Ooofta...thank God it worked out the way it did with no permanent damage. Except to your liver. ------------- |
Posted By: A Person
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:21
| I can't think of the single most stupid thing I've done, but the stupidest thing I do on a consistent basis is choke on my own spit. |
Posted By: The Doctor
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:24
Somehow I pulled a 90 out of my butt. ------------- I can understand your anger at me, but what did the horse I rode in on ever do to you? |
Posted By: Epignosis
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:26
That sh*t happened last year. This time of year, actually. I have (and had) three kids. That's why it's ranked as #1 on "Stupid." Had it not been for good company, I could have encountered more serious injuries, like walking out in front of car. I had nothing to gain and every reason to know better. ------------- https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays" rel="nofollow - https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays |
Posted By: Polymorphia
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:34
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The most recent was back in 10th grade. I was homeschooled and procrastinated working on my curriculum until the final month when everything was due. I literally finished my entire 10th grade year in the month of December, waking up at 6 and going to bed anywhere from 11 to 4:30, taking breaks only for eating and sleeping and typed out my last essay just before New Years. It sucked. ------------- https://dreamwindow.bandcamp.com/releases" rel="nofollow - My Music 
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Posted By: Luna
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:44
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Not investing in Eastern Poland ------------- https://aprilmaymarch.bandcamp.com/track/the-badger" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:45
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Rob....I think we all have a moment like that at some point. Sort of a wake up. I did about 10 years ago, though in less dramatic fashion than your story.....since then I've really stopped drinking heavy. I have a couple on the weekend and that's about it. Tony.....crunch time! That must have sucked but at least you can say you were honing a skill for later. Employers like people who can come in and get it done under pressure!  ------------- |
Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:46
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Not sure if incidents triggered due to blind rage (or annoyance, however you wanna call it) count. If you don't wanna hear that one, then I'm changing the channel. I've done a number of equally stupid things, but the most interesting and least weird of all ('cause I've done some really weird yet unfunny things that will make you think like I'm some kind of an underage psycho-f$%k) would have to be this. Alright, chaps. Some of you were drunk, some of you procrastinated, but I bet I can top anybody here because I was 17-18 years old ... and sober. Me and a metalhead decided to compete against bigger, more professional local high school bands ... as a duo. I was scrambling to write a really stupid half-assed prog-metal thing with a few sections and nonsensical lyrics. Think of the worst thing ever written in prog metal ... mine has to be worse. I put together the following items: - an electric guitar - a keyboard - a tiny Yamaha amp - a mic (without a stand) - a whistle ('cause I guess I thought I was a mighty-fine f$%king whistler) - a sheet of metal that resembled a musical saw (because it gave off some sound) - I think I also brought an ocarina (which I couldn't play to save my life) I saw this tech-metal band with all the PA ready (now imagine all this s$%t I brought) and the singer growling (which is something I to this day don't understand). My time to perform came. My metalhead buddy didn't show up. Imagine yourself alone, performing the dumbest piece in the history of mankind that wasn't finished and wasn't rehearsed. You get the picture. Define disaster ... it's when a guy from a competing band is trying to help you ... by plugging your mic (brought up close to your keyboard's tiny speakers) to his amp, and then you are playing your guitar and singing horses#$t. The mind reels. Then next day I was asked if I was influenced by some comedy bands. I should have said "yes" instead of getting upset and saying something else.
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Posted By: Dean
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:47
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TonyR: "Would you like to be an Admin?" Me: "Sure, why not..." ------------- What? |
Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:50
Andrey....your story is epic!  ------------- |
Posted By: Polymorphia
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:53
------------- https://dreamwindow.bandcamp.com/releases" rel="nofollow - My Music
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Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:53
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^ Stress as a superpower ... I used to think it was a great motivator. I was wrong and nearly failed my AP English 5-6 course.
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Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:56
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Dean.....but look at the bright side....
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Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 20:58
I have heard there are people like that.....they literally perform best if they self impose a very short window of time for themselves. But be careful of too much stress, it can harm your body. ------------- |
Posted By: Polymorphia
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 21:04
I need to hear this piece------------- https://dreamwindow.bandcamp.com/releases" rel="nofollow - My Music
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Posted By: Dean
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 21:09
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Regardless of what you read into my posts here I'm actually quite a reserved and quiet guy in real life, until you pour drink down my neck, but even then not all reservations and inhibitions manage to fly out the window. The following morning my Dad informed me that even though I had evidently had a good night if I ever did it again he'd "kick my arse from here to christmas and back again". He then dragged be outside to to show me where I'd left the bike: embedded in the bushes with the engine still running.
------------- What? |
Posted By: Polymorphia
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 21:12
------------- https://dreamwindow.bandcamp.com/releases" rel="nofollow - My Music
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Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 21:24
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Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 21:37
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I was a lucky devil myself. My stepdad told me to park his Porsche outside near his house. It was really dark, I didn't know how to turn the lights on this alien, and because it was really dark, I realized I've just driven the car off the curb. Off the curb! [Bump, bump] Then I thought: "Did I just ruin the car? Still seems to be driving fine." Took a good look at it using some light source and figured: "Looks fine. Nothing looks broken. Fooh! It could turn out really bad. ... I'm a  !"
 (Actually, the evidence was gone along with my dead PC.)It was actually that moment that eradicated one of my biggest, dumbest, most ambitious delusions from my head. It was then when I thought "never again" and began perfecting my overall style. Think I'm doing just fine right now, being under the spell of Donald Fagen, Peter Hammill, and Scott Walker.
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Posted By: Epignosis
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 21:42
Ah, I have a few live show disaster stories to tell. Putting on a bad (or even awful) show isn't stupid. It's learning how to do something better. ------------- https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays" rel="nofollow - https://epignosis.bandcamp.com/album/a-month-of-sundays |
Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 22:00
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^ Thanks for the support, Rob.
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Posted By: siLLy puPPy
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 22:26
| Thinking that a certain citrus based air freshener smelled so very very good that i decided to try it as underarm deodorant. My armpits were on fire for hours. BAD DOG!!! |
Posted By: stonebeard
Date Posted: July 31 2014 at 23:10
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Caution, this might be graphic and embarrassing. Ok, then. I shaved my balls once anticipating sex for the first time with a lady I was really into, and cut myself with the razor (first mistake; always use a guard and not a razor blade, for f**k's sake). Then--against all odds--I actually did get the chance to seal the deal, but I had developed razor burn and so for the entire time I was caught between arousal and excruciating pain. So it turns out a guy's ability to perform doesn't really work under those circumstances, and I bailed. She was really pissed, I was really embarrassed, and it ended there. Lesson learned. Now I'm onto new ways to royally screw up with the ladies. ------------- http://soundcloud.com/drewagler" rel="nofollow - My soundcloud. Please give feedback if you want! |
Posted By: Tom Ozric
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 01:26
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Nobody would want to know some of the crazy-stupid sh*t I've done (and still do...). An immature person never learns........ |
Posted By: Slartibartfast
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 03:21
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I don't need to do stupid things. Misfortune has a way of finding me on a regular basis.
------------- Released date are often when it it impacted you but recorded dates are when it really happened... 
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Posted By: The Pessimist
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 05:19
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Drank two full bottles of Buckfast wine in Glasgow. I made a record number of apologies to my friends in the morning.
------------- "Market value is irrelevant to intrinsic value." Arnold Schoenberg |
Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 05:29
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^ I take it you do not want to divulge what happened.
You could try me, but since we are on a thread, ... . |
Posted By: Atavachron
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 05:38
Noted-- perhaps a nice trim next time. ------------- "Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." -- John F. Kennedy |
Posted By: ole-the-first
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 05:44
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The most stupid thing I can remember was to miss the Werner Herzog retrospective in my city.
------------- This night wounds time. |
Posted By: Dean
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 05:44
...for our readers not conversant with this British favourite, it's like Boones Farm wine on steroids. Buckfast Tonic Wine is made by Benedictine monks in Buckfast Abbey, Somerset. When it comes to brewing alcoholic beverages you really can't trust the Benedictine's because, like the herbal liqueur that also bears their name, it was originally sold as a medicine for medicinal purposes only. It is 15% proof with the equivalent caffeine content of 8 cans of cola - measure for measure that's more than Red Bull. ------------- What? |
Posted By: Tom Ozric
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 05:56
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Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 05:59
Oh wow ------------- |
Posted By: Guldbamsen
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 06:21
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I remember going sledding with one of my friends named Mike a couple of years ago. We arrived at this huge hill down by the lake I grew up around. The light of day had subsided, and you couldn't actually see the bottom part of the appending ride. He went first with me shortly after. The speed was intense from the get go, increasing rapidly due to my, at the time, 100+ kilos of man rocket. -I briefly note that Mike has stopped, only to see a small ramp carved out of ice and snow right in front of me. I swoosh elegantly up in the air, sled flying away underneath me...........yeah baby, this feels like flying! -I think to myself with a huge smile on my face, and for around and about 13-14 meters no less. Slam!!!!!!! And I land on my tail bone feeling a sensation I had never ever experienced in my life before; my arse had exploded! Looking back at this, I see this as some kind of evil and twisted form of evolutionary poetic justice - Breaking a bone which is nothing but an obsolete remnant of an ancient ancestor of ours. Now, in this day and age, you only ever really know you own one, when you inadvertently molest it and feel it's evolution fuelled pain. Ask any monkey, I say. I spent the next 4 weeks trying to partake in an assignment for University, doped up on some strong medicine making it almost impossible to read anything off a computer screen. 4 hours of not taking the drugs resulted in me lying on the floor like a grotesque fetus. Those were the days. Fun times. ------------- “The Guide says there is an art to flying or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” - Douglas Adams |
Posted By: Dean
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 06:49
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..when I was kid we had an ant infestation in the house, being inventive I tried freezing them using the butane gas from an aerosol can of lighter-fuel. On reflection doing that near an open fire-grate was a pretty stupid idea but fortunately my hair and eyebrows did grow back. A few years later Dad tossed a dead watch battery into the same fire-grate which also turned out to be an equally stupid idea as the resulting explosion showered the burning coals across the room. However, it was my Mum who takes the crown for stupid mishaps with this fireplace - she used to use an old wooden tea-tray to force the fire whenever it was on the verge of going out (you cover the opening with the tray which forces more air to be drawn up across the coals ... don't try this at home). On this occasion she decided to prop the tray in place with a poker while she went and did something else (women and their multitasking... it will be their undoing). Long-story-short: left unattended the tray inevitably caught fire, which she grabbed and took outside onto the lawn to extinguish. A passing neighbour noticing that smoke and flames where billowing from our chimney-stack came over to help, but on seeing her kneeling on the grass trying to beat out the flames from the burning tea-tray quipped: "Typical Pauline, sets the house on fire and is now praying for rain..."
------------- What? |
Posted By: Guldbamsen
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 07:12
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Making homemade hot sauce out of habañeros and forgetting to wash my hands before taking a wee is another unintelligent endeavor of mine. After splashing cold water on my salsa region for a few minutes with little to no relief at all, I remember that capsaicin is oil based. I run for the milk, ending up in a highly asexual and uncomfortably position, sitting on the edge of a leather chair with my penis stuffed neatly down a large glass of full-cream milk. The moment my roomie walked in the door was probably one of the most awkward moments of my life. ------------- “The Guide says there is an art to flying or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” - Douglas Adams |
Posted By: HolyMoly
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 08:52
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I'm going to bypass my stupid drunk stories (of which there are a few)
because they are at least explainable - people do stupid things when
they get stupid drunk. However, one time I did something so totally
stupid while sober, I still cringe in shame when I think about it almost
20 years later. This is a classic example of a "brain fart" that
resulted in extreme embarrassment. I totally just "wasn't thinking".
Most of you know me fairly well, and I hope you don't think of me as a
crazy sicko after reading this. (now there's a great setup) So I'm in the lobby of this hotel in Atlanta. I was in grad school at the time, and a study group had agreed to meet there because they had a nice open area with couches. I got up and went to the bathroom (I needed to go "number two"). There were two stalls, and for some reason I preferred one over the other, but I wasn't sure if it was occupied or not. Because I'm tall, I looked over the top of the stall to see if it was occupied. OKAY STOP RIGHT THERE. Who does that? Crazy perverts looking for a good time. It turns out there was someone in there, and he was understandably upset that I was going around peeping at men on the toilet. He started verbally retaliating at me, and I tried as calmly as I could to convince him that I had just made a mistake, and that I'm not a weirdo. I thought by acting nonchalant rather than defensive, I could make my case better. I think it worked. I re-joined the study group, and I wonder what my face looked like as I met my classmates. I felt like I had just lost my mind. But all it was was the failure to make that mental connection between "need to know if stall is occupied" and "but the downside risk of actually looking inside is greater than the benefits of finding out." I'm a logical guy, and I was aghast at how thoroughly I had failed to act logically (or even sanely). ------------- My other avatar is a Porsche It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased. -Kehlog Albran |
Posted By: The Pessimist
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 09:38
Nailed it there Dean. In other words, one bottle is more than enough. Two bottles means a picture like this on Facebook the next day:  No prizes for which one is me in the picture. As for what I had to apologise for Andrey, I may divulge another time  ------------- "Market value is irrelevant to intrinsic value." Arnold Schoenberg |
Posted By: Polymorphia
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 09:46
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When I was six, I went to a friend's birthday party. We engaged in a rolling-down-hill racing tournament. I won, and proceeded to throw up all over my friend's birthday cake later. The prize was a rock. ------------- https://dreamwindow.bandcamp.com/releases" rel="nofollow - My Music
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Posted By: presdoug
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 09:53
| This takes the cake-I was drunk one night in my teens, and started to pick my nose with a can opener. All I can remember is looking at the blood pouring out of my nasal passage. |
Posted By: HolyMoly
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 09:56
 ------------- My other avatar is a Porsche It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased. -Kehlog Albran |
Posted By: The Doctor
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 10:05
Good job. I forgot about this when I posted last night. But when I was 21 I went to a Christmas party on Xmas Eve. At the time, I lived in a basement apartment. When I got home, I fell down the entire flight of steps to the basement(something like 18 steps). Fortunately, all I hurt was my left thigh which had a massive bruise on it. At the point this happened I was too drunk to feel ANY pain. But the next afternoon I woke up to the feeling of a knife being driven into my left thigh. Not to mention the pain in my head. I was lucky. I could just as easily have broken my neck.  ------------- I can understand your anger at me, but what did the horse I rode in on ever do to you? |
Posted By: Jim Garten
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 11:16
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Similarly to Dean, my hands down most stupid act was in 1982 - I was at the indestructible age of 19 & in possession of a mean machine 2 wheeler - OK then, a scratty Yamaha RS100... My 19 year old self decided I'd ridden from my friend's house in Welwyn to home so many times, it was perfectly OK for me to down about 7 pints + a couple of vodkas then ride home in the dark in -5 degree temperatures and to hell with the warnings of black ice. Stupid? Yes - Lucky? Definitely Luckily, no police were around in Hatfield when I lost the bike on a roundabout, slid about 20 feet & hit a lamp-post. Luckily there was no other traffic to hit me as I did it. Luckily, I was in enough shock to ride the remaining 8 miles home without further incident... ...despite having 2 cracked ribs & a wrist broken in 5 places, which kept me off work for 3 weeks and in plaster between February & the beginning of August. I don't usually condone foul language here, but without a doubt, that night, I was a completely stupid w**ker! -------------  Jon Lord 1941 - 2012 |
Posted By: The Pessimist
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 13:59
So long as you got the goods though, who cares how much blood there is? (I'm pretty sure that's the moto of a very twisted burglar somewhere) ------------- "Market value is irrelevant to intrinsic value." Arnold Schoenberg |
Posted By: HolyMoly
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 14:07
------------- My other avatar is a Porsche It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased. -Kehlog Albran |
Posted By: Nogbad_The_Bad
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 14:10
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I woke up one morning in my late teens with these funny zigzag marks up my arms and a big purple stain on my shirt. It took me a while to workout I'd fallen down an escalator holding a kebab getting home from the pub pissed in Newcastle ------------- Ian Host of the Post-Avant Jazzcore Happy Hour on Progrock.com https://podcasts.progrock.com/post-avant-jazzcore-happy-hour/ |
Posted By: Nogbad_The_Bad
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 14:15
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One day I was cooking frozen beefburgers for lunch. I wasn't really thinking and decided to separate two that were stuck together by prying them apart with the pointy end of a kitchen knife. Net result a nice stab wound in the palm of my hand and a trip to Casualty ------------- Ian Host of the Post-Avant Jazzcore Happy Hour on Progrock.com https://podcasts.progrock.com/post-avant-jazzcore-happy-hour/ |
Posted By: twseel
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 14:20
------------- 
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Posted By: HolyMoly
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 14:20
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One time I was pitching in baseball and got a runner caught between third and home. I had the ball, and he was as good as out. But I threw the ball to third base, and he ran home safe. I bet the people in the stands were peeing their pants at that mistake. And the look on the third baseman's face I'll never forget.
------------- My other avatar is a Porsche It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased. -Kehlog Albran |
Posted By: twseel
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 14:29
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But seriously, I could tell about the time a few months ago when I practically emptied a waterpipe at a bar in Malta, mixed it with some beer, threw up in the toilet and sat in a corner suffering until almost all my friends had left, but that wasn't as bad as a terrible summer camp I went to when I was 13 yo, but that was too embarrassing(I'm not too proud of my early childhood) and too long ago(I have poor long term memory) to tell any more about. -------------
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Posted By: presdoug
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 15:19
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Posted By: The Pessimist
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 18:31
------------- "Market value is irrelevant to intrinsic value." Arnold Schoenberg |
Posted By: Man With Hat
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 21:33
 ------------- Dig me...But don't...Bury me I'm running still, I shall until, one day, I hope that I'll arrive Warning: Listening to jazz excessively can cause a laxative effect. |
Posted By: The Doctor
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 21:43
^  That was such an amazing tale, David. You win the internet. Thread over.
------------- I can understand your anger at me, but what did the horse I rode in on ever do to you? |
Posted By: A Person
Date Posted: August 01 2014 at 21:49
Are you a redditor, by chance?
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Posted By: Logan
Date Posted: August 02 2014 at 10:22
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No humour here, as this has been really depressing me. The stupidest thing that I currently regret the most happened a few weeks ago. I have been very stressed over the last few months since a series of expensive financial issues and other problems have been hitting me and my family in rapid succession. When I'm anxious I get insomnia and can't think straight. It has become very hard for me to deal with people, and I do have social anxiety. Despite feeling very strongly that I was being conned, I allowed myself to be tricked into buying an absolute lemon of a used car. I knew how to handle the situation from the outset, and got lots of warning signs saying walk away to me, but I was worried about offending or angering the person (I hate any confrontation) and my too trusting wife really wanted the car. I was panicking and couldn't think, and that person capitalized on it. I now know that to fix the car properly could cost me over eight thousand dollars (which is more than the car is worth), and already buying it maxed out my budget. It's very hard to be without an operating vehicle. ------------- Just a fanboy passin' through. |
Posted By: Polymorphia
Date Posted: August 02 2014 at 11:45
Did you ever convince him of your story?------------- https://dreamwindow.bandcamp.com/releases" rel="nofollow - My Music
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Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: August 02 2014 at 11:48
Sorry to hear about what has befallen you. Do you have a plan?
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Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: August 02 2014 at 17:57
 ------------- |
Posted By: Tapfret
Date Posted: August 03 2014 at 04:03
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If I eliminate all stupidity that involved my penis, I would have to say smoking for 14 years was easily the dumbest. The most acute smoking related stupidity was when I was 19. I was driving with a lit cigarette in my hand and dropped it in my lap (which I suppose involves my penis and shouldn't count by my parameters) while making a right turn. In my panic to eliminate setting my pants on fire I looked down while trying to brush the smoldering embers. When I looked up I was heading toward a tree off to the right of my now completed turn. When I went to slam on the brake my size 13 (euro 47) shoe hit the gas pedal first. Crunch. I still smoked for 10 more years after that.
 ------------- https://www.last.fm/user/Tapfret" rel="nofollow">  https://bandcamp.com/tapfret" rel="nofollow - Bandcamp |
Posted By: Finnforest
Date Posted: August 03 2014 at 09:54
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Ahhh yes....smoking related driving mishaps.....always problematic. Great story Ian.
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Posted By: Slartibartfast
Date Posted: August 03 2014 at 13:07
I think we have a weiner, uhm winner. ------------- Released date are often when it it impacted you but recorded dates are when it really happened...
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Posted By: Dayvenkirq
Date Posted: August 17 2014 at 22:10
| [dumb content erased] |
Posted By: TGM: Orb
Date Posted: August 18 2014 at 18:46
Yep. There's also learning that if you don't remember a song you should stop and do something else rather than torturing yourself in front of a room full of people. Learning that was an extremely awkward six minutes with a ukulele and an embarrassed sympathetic audience.
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Posted By: Metalmarsh89
Date Posted: August 18 2014 at 19:50
I don't know how the pain compares, but I performed an act of equal stupidity. Also making salsa, I had just finished cutting the jalapenos and onions, and before I did anything else, I proceeded to reach up and rub both of my eyes with my fingers. Within seconds I was writhing on the floor (continuing to rub, of course). Instinct told me to get cold water, so I felt my way to the kitchen sink and began flushing my eyes as best I could from the kitchen faucet. Then I went to my bedroom and lay on the floor with a cold, wet towel plastered to my eyes. That was possibly the most painful event of my life, even more than getting poison ivy in the nether regions of my butt. For better or for worse, there is a conscious (and sometimes even subconscious) part of me that does not like to be noisy or loud. So through this whole event, I managed to not make a single peep, and so my roommates wouldn't have known at all had they not noticed how incredibly red my eyes were a couple hours later. ------------- Want to play mafia? Visit http://www.mafiathesyndicate.com" rel="nofollow - here . |
Posted By: Padraic
Date Posted: August 19 2014 at 08:46
Not so bad as habañeros (probably jalapenos or something), but I've done similar. You only make that mistake once.  |
Posted By: Guldbamsen
Date Posted: August 19 2014 at 09:03
Yup...this you only do once I was considering posting in this thread about last weekend, but then again I already wrote that somewhere else on this board, and I'm not sure exactly how much I want to milk that cow. Let's just say that stupidity - assumed stupidity no less, indeed was paramount. One morning I woke up inside my friend's apartment on a lawn. I pretty much thought I was hallucinating, but then small glimpses of the night before started flickering, and I remembered something about stealing grass somewhere down by the lake, where richer folk live - and then proceeding with the main dish: making our own garden. Things get kinda blurry from there on end, but there is something about some coconuts that I can't quite place.
------------- “The Guide says there is an art to flying or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” - Douglas Adams |
Posted By: Guldbamsen
Date Posted: August 19 2014 at 09:06
What's a redditor precious?  ------------- “The Guide says there is an art to flying or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” - Douglas Adams |
Posted By: Dean
Date Posted: August 19 2014 at 09:30
Gentlemen, that reminds me... One night after a looong session down the pub a group of us were Needless to say, in our drunken stupor swapping over all the garden ornaments from one garden to the other seemed like a good jape so we set about moving these heavy pots as quietly as we could. That is: with lots of giggling, swearing and exaggerated stage-whispers interrupted by very loud "shhh-ing" followed by more inebriated giggling. More by luck than judgement we would have gotten away with it too because we managed to move everything without disturbing the occupants of either house. If we had stopped there and then and simply continued on our way our plan would have succeeded. But we were all very very drunk and plans have a habit of being over-reached in that situation... Some bright spark suggested we should swap over the cars from the drives too... Exactly how we intended to do that wasn't clear, I think someone suggested we could "bounce" them, but fortunately (considering the consequences if we had tried) we never got to find out because as soon as one of us touched the first car its alarm went off and we, in a panic, turned as one and ran. ------------- What? |
Posted By: Guldbamsen
Date Posted: August 19 2014 at 09:42
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Brilliant! Love the original draft. Ahhh and those "extra-plans" always end up wrong. Pushing the envelope just that eenie tiny bit more - especially when inebriated - inevitably ends in things being broken, people getting arrested/hurt/knocked out/fond of spewing chunks in all the wrong places etc etc. ------------- “The Guide says there is an art to flying or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.” - Douglas Adams |
Posted By: Padraic
Date Posted: August 19 2014 at 09:45
| Ah yes. I had five roommates at university, and after a "pub session" we discovered to our drunken delight that we had the collective strength to pick up and move small cars. Never did get to see the face of the guy who came out to find his car rotated 90 degrees... |