What makes people find Prog boring?

Wow. What a narrow pompous self-important defense of prog rock. So basically everything else is music for dunces, is what you’re saying. This is one of the reasons why people don’t like prog rock. The idea that many prog rock musician carry around with them that they are the only ones doing anything with integrity, that it is the only “thinking man’s” music. Regardless of how many times progrock is mentioned using upper case letters, it still is actually closer to the “over-thinking man’s” music, to be honest. (As for the storytelling angle, like it or not I think folk music has the leg up on just about every other genre because they’ve had to tell a good story, there isn’t a whole lot else is there? Pretty much an acoustic guitar and singer trying to hold a few people’s interest.)

Any genre (prog in this case) isn’t boring in and of itself. Individual bands can be. And some genres have a preponderance of artists that are boring. Obviously, the manufactured boy bands and their girl counterparts are boring. Hair dresser music is boring (you know, the stuff girl’s hair salons play – Janet Jackson/Mariah Carey/ etc etc). Jazz is f’ing boring. Country sucks, but every once in a while one of those hats comes out with an actual song. Of course they proceed to ruin it with all the hee-haw touches. But who cares? People like what they like.

Modern prog can be interesting to watch live because the musicianship is often spectacular, but try listening to it at home . . . . the majority of it is unlistenable, mainly because there are no songs! I’m generalising here, but the majority of today’s prog rock bands haven’t a clue how to write an actual song. That doesn’t mean they have to start writing a 2 minute pop song or be the Ramones or something, but, my god, some of this stuff is just a cacophony of modified scales and riffs thrown together with  ‘clever’ time changes and “layered construction” in an effort to come across as, you know, real deep musicians.

My nephew plays in a prog rock band and they are monster musicians, they believe in themselves, they’ve been at it for years now, they practice a lot, they record a lot (they don’t play out a lot, that should tell you something). But a minute into one of their ‘songs’ and I’m already getting bored. Every drum, belltree, cymbal, and gong has been hit in the first ‘song’ or two, interspersed with loads of syncopated heavy choked cymbal stops (why?), syncopated guitar chugging in 11/4 and a dozen notes per second keyboard flurries from one end of the keyboard to the other . . .  all the clichés are in place. But to what end? All that stuff doesn’t support anything! It just lurches from one thing to another, throw in the kitchen sink and give it a title and somehow they think they have a song. It’s a very impressive kitchen sink, mind you, but the plug is missing and it’s empty. Dude, I know you can play the hell out of your instruments, you’ve been doing that in every song, ad nauseum. But it’s like listening to Chopin’s Etudes. Write a f’ing song will ya?!!! And then you can chain them all together with all that complex stuff you’re so good at.

They finally got a singer. So what do they do? Do they start writing songs with the singer? No, they just shovel the singer on top of what they already have written, all the music is written beforehand, the singer is an afterthought added for marketing purposes. And after considerable listening on my part to try to find good modern progrock, these guys are as good as most anybody out there, known or unknown. Very few exceptions.

Having said all that . . .  that doesn’t make prog invalid or anything. You like what you like. And if you’re into it, you don’t find it boring. But the bands who actually make music worth listening to are few and far between in every genre in my opinion. But so what? So don’t listen. Who knows where it all starts? Does the fact that the “shallow” Monkees was my first concert experience have anything to do with Yes being my favourite band for 40 years now? The spark starts somewhere, don’t discount anything’s worth. If listening to Tangerine Dream “is just too much” for my ‘uneducated’ lady and she puts a Diana Ross & the Supremes disc on, do I go all pompous on her ass or do I get into the cool groove of those great Motown players? Yep – I’ll sacrifice my musical integrity, enjoy the good in the “mindless” product and get the beat going with my lady late into the night. See how your “exclusivity” works for you then.