THING-FISH

This is probably one of the top 5 most controversial items in Zappa's catalog, and that's saying a lot. I wince upon remembering that I dared to listen to this album in the same house as my parents. I hope they weren't listening through my bedroom door!

This was originally a three-record boxed set, with a libretto containing all the dialog and song lyrics; it's since been turned into a 2-CD set. Approximately half of the album is spoken dialog or narration, and the majority of the song material is reworked from prior material that had already been released. The theme is multi-fold: it's a parody of Broadway, a political statement on government testing of harmful chemicals on the public (a conspiracy theory I was not previously aware of), a ridiculous expose' on racism and the blurring of the lines in gender roles and identity brought about by yuppie culture. It's gross. It's tasteless. It's probably taking things a bit too far. But it's a good piece of work.

Musically, here's what happens:

Side One: The Prologue is a musical background performed on bass/guitar/drums, with Ike Willis as Thing Fish providing some background narration. "The Mammy Nuns" is a strong rock song (also performed live as an instrumental guitar vehicle, see You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore, Vol. 1) sung by Willis. "Harry and Rhonda" introduces Terry and Dale Bozzio's characters, the focus of the story, some dialog with more Synclavier music. "Galoot Update" is a recasting of the song "The Blue Light" (from Tinsel Town Rebellion), which itself featured a lot of spoken parts; these parts are replaced by more Thing Fish narration, very well integrated with the music. Probably the best track on the album.

Side Two: This begins with a tangential plot which is never adequately explained. The Zappa standard "The Torture Never Stops" is used to bring in an "Evil Prince" into the story, torturing people in his dungeon (just like the original song), but there's a lengthy Broadway-style song inserted in the middle sung by Napoleon Murphy Brock (occasionally performed live by Ray White; see You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore, Vol. 4) that also bemoans the state of Broadway. Confusing. The side ends with the dubious inclusion of the song "You Are What You Is", which is identical to the studio version, but has Thing Fish's interjections between each line, which work pretty well, adding to the song instead of subtracting. Still, plot-wise, I'm a bit lost.

Side Three: As on the You Are What You Is album, that song is followed by "Mudd Club" and "The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing", which follow the same pattern. By this time, the Harry and Rhonda plot has pretty much been lost, and it's hard to understand where Zappa is going with this. It's still entertaining, of course, and these are undeniably good songs, made just a little funnier with Thing Fish talking during them. "Clowns on Velvet" is an otherwise unreleased Zappa instrumental in the same vein as complex pieces like "Moggio" from the Man From Utopia album, though it too has a bit of narration inserted in it. Finally Harry returns to the action, forced to watch his early life as a boy re- enacted on stage: "Harry as a Boy" comprises more dialogue with Synclavier backing. And lo and behold, Harry is outed as gay ("for business purposes"), and the somewhat mocking "He's So Gay" brings all the Mammy Nuns (Thing-Fish and his potato-headed cronies) out to sing on his behalf.

Side Four: "The Massive Improve'lence" offers more dialogue, Rhonda (Harry's wife) suddenly aghast at discovering his secret life. But Thing-Fish keeps her at bay for the time being, in the interest of keeping the plot (such as it is) moving forward. "Artificial Rhonda" retells Harry's procurement of a wife, a depthless automaton of a woman, sung to the tune of "Ms Pinky" originally from the Zoot Allures album. Man and wife give birth to a little automaton of their own, the "Crab Grass Baby", who speaks in a robotic voice throughout this darkly synthesized piece. "The White Boy Troubles" is a brief tune that introduces yet another character, Brown Moses, played by Johnny "Guitar" Watson, though I fail to really see where he fits in the plot. The side ends with more narration from Thing-Fish.

Side Five: Stay with me here, we're almost through. This side gets off to a fine start with "No Not Now", a song previously released on Ship Arriving Too Late to Save a Drowning Witch, but with Thing-Fish interjections overdubbed on top. Again, it's funny and adds a layer of humor to the song. I still feel like the song doesn't really serve the story, but it's nice to have a good song come on now and then. It is a music album, after all. But while we've been enjoying it, Rhonda has just about had enough, and she furiously calls Harry a "worm" and has sex with her briefcase ("Briefcase Boogie"), which is Zappa's non- subtle way of conveying the trend of 80s careerism and sexlessness. You might want to check outside your door at this point to see if your mom is anywhere around. Brown Moses returns with a fine R&B styled song called "Brown Moses", which comments on the action in the past few tracks.

Side Six: For the final side, the Evil Prince (remember him?) returns to sing "Wistful wit a Fistful", for reasons I can't detect. Then all hell breaks loose in "Drop Dead", with Rhonda going even further out beyond the realms of family entertainment, if yo' 'quire my drif'. Finally, with Harry and Rhonda's marriage fallen apart but everyone happier somehow, Thing-Fish ties things up into a somewhat happy ending, over a backing track that is "No Not Now" played backwards (thus the title "Won Ton On").

In conclusion, the good and the bad:

Good: 1) Ike Willis's Thing-Fish character, spoken with an amusing, knowingly racist dialect similar to Amos and Andy (it helps that Willis is African-American himself). Willis is on top of the role and performs it brilliantly. 2) Terry and Dale Bozzio pulling off a very convincing, albeit over-the-top yuppie couple. 3) Some of the Synclavier backing is quite effective, and shows a side of Zappa not seen previously.

Bad: 1) Forcing existing songs into the plot without much to tie them in. 2) Frequent lapses in good taste. I get when Zappa's fans insist that it all has a point, but as was the case with "Sy Borg" on Joe's Garage, some of it seems like the "point" is just an excuse to be as extreme and obnoxious as he likes. 3) A choppy plot line and unclear story development.

If you're a Zappa fan, and haven't heard this, by all means do. There's enough humor and good ideas to make it worthwhile: it's neither a masterpiece nor a waste of time. But please brace yourself for some sick material, if you're not already on Zappa's somewhat perverse wavelength.