BACK TO FRONT

Ewwww. They should really put a warning label on hazardous music like this: "May induce intense bouts of frustration, disgust, nausea, vomiting, and thoughts of suicide." It's true the thoughts of either ending my life or the disk's life did cross my mind, after it being my aural displeasure of having heard the likes of "AA Man" and "Sally, Don't Change It". Let's just say those are the only songs I fear hearing like Mr. Satan himself.

"Back to Front" has Caravan sounding like someone added waaaaay too much cream to the band's coffee and smothered their toast with some of the most disgustingly mundane adult contemporary influences. Well, either Pye Hastings and Richard Sinclair had lobotomies for unique cord changes and good taste or had just recently bought a copy of the 1# smash hit, "No Jacket's Required", and were really digging those 'cool grooves'.

I would proudly like to proclaim that 'inspiration' and "Back to Front" are complete and utter oxymorons and this is coming from the guy who would like to have the title track of "Better by Far" played at his wedding. However, "AA Man", Taking My Breath Away", "Sally, Don't Change It" and "Back to Herme Bay Front" are some of the most mawkish adult pop clichés not penned by Sting. Tasteless sax playing and awkward disco influences abound and the good melodies have flown south for the winter. Only on the mild but kinda enjoyable, "All Aboard" do we get a quality Hastings melody. Pssst.... the only other good part on this whole album is when Pye plays a freaking, almost Zappa like wah-wah guitar solo on "Proper Job/Back to Front" but the rest of the song is dog excrements.

What's even more sad and pathetic is that this collaborative piece of crap was made by Caravan's original lineup. Yesh, the one that brought you "If I Could Do It All?" and "The Land of Grey and Pink" and all those other fazed cookies, but now they've created a swift kick in the crotch to their legacy and all of their fans with "Back to Front". None of this music resembles Caravan in the slightest and this is a fair warning for all ye wide eyed and romantic Caravan followers out there who still have happiness, hope, and belief that their Canterbury idols can do no wrong.

Album Grade: D+